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History Jizz
#26
I was about to commend your lineage myself, hussaf.

Found out one of my Polack relatives died in Dachau. So now I can tell everyone I am deeply affected by my ancestor's plight.
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#27
(01-11-2016, 08:37 PM)CivilianChick Wrote:
(01-11-2016, 08:29 PM)frankieb Wrote: France before the revolution as a member of the French Court at Versailles. I'd just like to see how the palace would've looked at the time without the modern day clutter of tourists.

I visited there when there weren't a lot of tourists around. I honestly wasn't that impressed by it.

It also smelled funny. Probably smelled ten times as bad back then.



I've been. There were too many tourists to really get a good view of the inside; it was like, wall to wall people. They also herded everyone through like cattle and wouldn't let them linger in one room for too long. The place is fucking massive though, and the general public doesn't see 90% of it. What were the smells? I don't recall a bad smell unless we're talking sweaty tourists. 
Victim of the negative karma bugger
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#28
(01-11-2016, 09:01 PM)life is killing me Wrote:
(01-11-2016, 07:08 PM)CivilianChick Wrote:
(01-11-2016, 04:06 PM)life is killing me Wrote: I'd be a goddamn Viking during the Great Heathen Army's invasion of England...except, you know, during the time the GHA was raiding and shit, not when Alfred came to power and started doing gay smart stuff like making each town into its own little fortress and actually winning battles. That probably had to suck for the Danes

Well  now that I think about it, you could fight in the Trojan War, since the archaeological record seems to indicate that it actually happened.

Fuck the books, I'll get a firsthand account from *you* once you sack the city. Make sure you grab the most interesting looking artifacts you see.

I'd like to see if Helen was actually beautiful enough to have had a war started over her. I mean, I've seen some beautiful women, but the thought that however many thousands of dudes died over what amounted to who, between Paris and Menelaus, got to got to bang her, boggles my mind. So if the Trojan War really did happen, I doubt it was solely  over one woman.

And as an aside, I would NOT want to be in any of the Crusades. Especially the one during which the Siege of Acre happened.


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Hell, Helen may not have even existed, let alone been the pretext for an entire war. Keep in mind the Iliad was written at least 300 years (minimum) after the events would have occurred.

The historical period that the Trojan War (the late Greek Bronze Age) took place in was a time of tremendous upheaval and conflict. It also right before (or possibly even during) the Late Bronze Age collapse, which was an absolutely catastrophic time in ancient history. They were probably fighting over resources or attacked because instability in Troy rendered it vulnerable and they decided to take advantage of the opportunity.

This is a good documentary about the Late Bronze collapse, even though it doesn't talk about Troy. Let's just say the shit hit the fan; BIG TIME.



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#29
A couple of things here:

1: I'd like to go back in time to a few locations with a slim profile digital camera in order to document a few things. (Let's topple the church/religion while we're at it)
2: I'd like to go back to document Viking era daily practices and religious rites.
3: I'd like to go back to Oak Island when it was first being touched by man and see it's entire history up to the notional treasure being buried.
4: There are several different coastal areas, now submerged or used as wet farmland, that I would like to visit at various points throughout history to see how they evolved and if they were anything prior to that (think of the more recent theories behind Atlantis actually being in southern Spain).
5: I want to go to Woodstock
6: There are a few people who's parents I would love to slap.

I like history, love ancient history, though I make no real effort to read up or discover more than I already know.
Just a dumb grunt.
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#30
(01-12-2016, 04:29 AM)Handicap Wrote: A couple of things here:

1: I'd like to go back in time to a few locations with a slim profile digital camera in order to document a few things. (Let's topple the church/religion while we're at it)
2: I'd like to go back to document Viking era daily practices and religious rites.
3: I'd like to go back to Oak Island when it was first being touched by man and see it's entire history up to the notional treasure being buried.
4: There are several different coastal areas, now submerged or used as wet farmland, that I would like to visit at various points throughout history to see how they evolved and if they were anything prior to that (think of the more recent theories behind Atlantis actually being in southern Spain).
5: I want to go to Woodstock
6: There are a few people who's parents I would love to slap.

I like history, love ancient history, though I make no real effort to read up or discover more than I already know.

2.) I'd like to see it out of curiosity but during one of my history courses I learned that the Viking period was surprisingly boring. It's would just be a bunch of Northern Europeans sitting around and doing their thing, (Farming, fishing, raising cattle etc. etc) and once a year they would say, "Okay, everyone, the crops are sewn, food is stockpiled and shit's pretty quiet, go grab your gear, it's time to go viking." Also, I learned the religion was a very private for Vikings and not very public. Cultural rites would be interesting though.

5.) FUCK EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS. While I can agree the music must have been amazing and a real treat, apparently the Woodstock "experience" sucked a major dick and a lot of stupid kids nearly died because they were literally stuck in the middle of a giant farm with no supplies and couldn't leave because of a sea of humanity and everyone lived in solid shit for the week. The "summer of love" is most definitely view through a rose-tinted lens.

6.) This is an amazing idea.

1.) As for my own list: I think seeing the world, especially America during the roaring 20's would be awesome. The artistic and cultural revolution happening after the first world war is astounding and it would be amazing to see.

2.) I'd love to see Ancient Rome in all of it's glory. 

3.) Colonial America would be interesting. Particulalry Boston, Philly, Annapolis, Alexandria and such. (Swing by Mt. Vernon, say what up to my homeboy GWash) Getting tanked with freemason's and the Founding Father's would be tight. 

4.) Seeing New Orleans during the Prohibition would be a hoot. 

5.) Visit rustbelt cities like Detroit, Cleveland and Pittsburgh during the 60's before the civil unrest of the time. (Particularly Detroit, to see what it looked like before half of it burned down during the riots and hear the Motown sound.)
OH YOU!

[Image: qVbUArb.gif?noredirect]


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#31
I want Togo back to Gettysburg with an AMK28, two Quadscons full of ammo, a fuel con with, a MK19, M2 and an M240.
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIIIIIN!
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#32
Several things I want to see and document for posterity:

1. I want to see the Native American mound city of Cahokia at its peak. There were 40,000 people living there at the late 13th century.

2. I want to see Tenochtitlan before the Spanish Conquest. The conquistadors were completely blown away by it. I also want to go back even earlier and see Teotihuacan its peak. And I want to see the Olmecs as well.

3. I want to read the lost Aztec and Mayan codices.

4. I want to see Stonehenge as it was built, and learn about the belief systems of the local people. Same goes for other megalithic monuments.

5. I want to visit the pre-colonial kingdoms of Africa that I never learned about in school.

6. I want to see the pyramids in their original glory, when they were covered shining white limestone. Now THAT would look cool.

7. I want to see the Inca Empire.

8. I want to see the Picts and learn about them, especially what the symbols they left meant.

9. I want to find whoever wrote the Voynich manuscript and FINALLY learn what the fuck it means.

10. I want to go to Easter Island and see the statues being put up, and learn how the Rongorongo writing system works, because we have samples of it and it has not been deciphered yet.

11. I want to document unrecorded extinct languages.

12. I want to record music that existed before music was ever even written down.

13. I want to learn about the religious practices and mythological systems of people whose belief systems are only known via fragmentary information.

14. I want to see the events described in the Bible (the ones that have historical backing, obviously). I'd also like to meet Jesus and interview him. That should settle a few questions once and for all.

15. I want to document some of the more interesting extinct animals, like the thylacine and the dodo.

16. I want to see extinct hominids, especially the ones that humans directly evolved from. I want to learn all I can about them, especially how hominid species who existed at the same time would have interacted with each other. I'd certainly would like to see what the hell the Denisovans looked like, since all we have is two teeth and a finger bone.

(01-12-2016, 06:49 AM)5.9lcummins Wrote: I want Togo back to Gettysburg with an AMK28, two Quadscons full of ammo, a fuel con with, a MK19, M2 and an M240.
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIIIIIN!

I think Genghis Khan would really like you.
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#33
(01-12-2016, 06:49 AM)The I 5.9lcummins Wrote: I want Togo back to Gettysburg with an AMK28, two Quadscons full of ammo, a fuel con with, a MK19, M2 and an M240.
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIIIIIN!

You dumb hicks would still find a way to lose and continue to spread your heretical hate of Sherman for liberating you fucks from yourselves. 


Sing like no one is listening, dance like no one is watching, and poop like no one is in the next stall.


Handicapable: Jesus, if you're an O you get awards like they're motrin at a Corpsman parade.
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#34
(01-12-2016, 04:29 AM)Handicap Wrote: 4: There are several different coastal areas, now submerged or used as wet farmland, that I would like to visit at various points throughout history to see how they evolved and if they were anything prior to that (think of the more recent theories behind Atlantis actually being in southern Spain).

If a submerged place was inhabited, there's usually a strong amount of indication that it was. Humans leave junk everywhere:
http://news.discovery.com/history/archaeology/small-underwater-pompeii-found-off-greek-island-141120.htm

If the area in question has already been heavily explored and no artifacts have been found (like the Yonagunu Monument or the Bimini Road, which were supposedly inhabited at one time), then its fairly definitive that nobody ever lived there.

(01-11-2016, 09:11 PM)frankieb Wrote:
(01-11-2016, 08:37 PM)CivilianChick Wrote:
(01-11-2016, 08:29 PM)frankieb Wrote: France before the revolution as a member of the French Court at Versailles. I'd just like to see how the palace would've looked at the time without the modern day clutter of tourists.

I visited there when there weren't a lot of tourists around. I honestly wasn't that impressed by it.

It also smelled funny. Probably smelled ten times as bad back then.






I've been. There were too many tourists to really get a good view of the inside; it was like, wall to wall people. They also herded everyone through like cattle and wouldn't let them linger in one room for too long. The place is fucking massive though, and the general public doesn't see 90% of it. What were the smells? I don't recall a bad smell unless we're talking sweaty tourists. 

Its hard to describe it exactly (keep in mind I was there several years ago), but my brother remarked at the time that it smelled like Louis XIV's unwashed dick.

Imagine how bad it would've stunk filled with 18th-century French people who didn't bathe very often and doused themselves in perfume and covered themselves with powder.

The gardens were nice though.

(01-12-2016, 07:11 AM)ban724 Wrote:
(01-12-2016, 06:49 AM)The I 5.9lcummins Wrote: I want Togo back to Gettysburg with an AMK28, two Quadscons full of ammo, a fuel con with, a MK19, M2 and an M240.
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIIIIIN!

You dumb hicks would still find a way to lose and continue to spread your heretical hate of Sherman for liberating you fucks from yourselves. 

Its kind of scary how easily I can imagine  5.9 as Achilles furiously dragging Hector's dead body behind him in a chariot.
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#35
(01-12-2016, 07:19 AM)CivilianChick Wrote: If a submerged place was inhabited, there's usually a strong amount of indication that it was. Humans leave junk everywhere:
http://news.discovery.com/history/archaeology/small-underwater-pompeii-found-off-greek-island-141120.htm

If the area in question has already been heavily explored and no artifacts have been found (like the Yonagunu Monument or the Bimini Road, which were supposedly inhabited at one time), then its fairly definitive that nobody ever lived there.

Your know-it-all ways astound me sometimes.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/03/150318-atlantis-morocco-santorini-plato-adams-ngbooktalk/

The areas I'm interested in are populated areas and the concentric circles and other clues used to identify them beyond basic theory were identified via satellite radar and surface penetration mapping, yet are still untouched because they are areas where a population is still present for the most part and no serious expedition will take place until someone stumbles across any type of hard, verifiable proof. Thus.. I would like to make trips back in time to these various areas to see what was really going on there. If Atlantis truly existed.
Just a dumb grunt.
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#36
Fuck yeah, I'd drag cut his belly open, tie and a piece of intestine to a tree and then hauling ass with him behind the chariot.
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#37
I wanna go back when we wuz kingz n shit and keep https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakub_(Nation_of_Islam)
From inventing y'all pale ass crackas.
Yesterday's gone on down the river and you can't get it back.
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#38
(01-12-2016, 09:31 AM)HardCoreTurtle Wrote: I wanna go back when we wuz kingz n shit and keep https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakub_(Nation_of_Islam)
From inventing y'all pale ass crackas.

Lol this is literally what the Wu-Tang Clan believes. The seriously believe it and mean it.

But then there's Y-chromosomal Adam, a dude believed to be the first and main ancestor for all human beings living today, and who was said to be African. So we might be African-American after all dogg
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#39
(01-12-2016, 09:56 AM)life is killing me Wrote:
(01-12-2016, 09:31 AM)HardCoreTurtle Wrote:


This is literally what the Wu-Tang Clan believes. They seriously believe it and mean it.

fixed
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#40
(01-12-2016, 07:43 AM)Handicap Wrote:
(01-12-2016, 07:19 AM)CivilianChick Wrote: If a submerged place was inhabited, there's usually a strong amount of indication that it was. Humans leave junk everywhere:
http://news.discovery.com/history/archaeology/small-underwater-pompeii-found-off-greek-island-141120.htm

If the area in question has already been heavily explored and no artifacts have been found (like the Yonagunu Monument or the Bimini Road, which were supposedly inhabited at one time), then its fairly definitive that nobody ever lived there.

Your know-it-all ways astound me sometimes.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/03/150318-atlantis-morocco-santorini-plato-adams-ngbooktalk/

The areas I'm interested in are populated areas and the concentric circles and other clues used to identify them beyond basic theory were identified via satellite radar and surface penetration mapping, yet are still untouched because they are areas where a population is still present for the most part and no serious expedition will take place until someone stumbles across any type of hard, verifiable proof. Thus.. I would like to make trips back in time to these various areas to see what was really going on there. If Atlantis truly existed.

My bad. Those techniques haven't been around for very long, so I didn't think of that. That does sound pretty damned interesting.

They recently discovered a "Superhenge" buried near Stonehenge. That would be great to see in its past glory:
http://www.history.com/news/newly-discovered-superhenge-may-rewrite-history
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#41
If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.
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#42
(01-12-2016, 09:24 AM)5.9lcummins Wrote: Fuck yeah, I'd drag cut his belly open, tie and a piece of intestine to a tree and then hauling ass with him behind the chariot.

All while running other enemies over, no doubt.

(01-12-2016, 11:00 AM)life is killing me Wrote: If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.

Yeah, same goes for the Nazca Lines, supposedly only visible via flight.

They're quite visible from nearby hills.
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#43
(01-12-2016, 11:00 AM)life is killing me Wrote: If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.

The colonists basically spread amongst several close Native groups, leading to mixed-race people already spoke English and understood Christianity. Not a bad ending to the usually cynical tale of colonialism.
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#44
That Wu-Tang skit is by far one of my favorites on that shit. "You need to diversify your funds, nikka" hahahahha
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#45
(01-12-2016, 11:00 AM)life is killing me Wrote: If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.

Roanoke has more to it than just that. There's also the map they recently realized has covered up locations on it that they are currently trying to figure out how to read without destroying; a map that traces a path from Roanoke further inland and apparently belonged to a family member of someone from Roanoke (I'll have to verify that last bit but I think that's what they said).
Just a dumb grunt.
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#46
(01-12-2016, 09:24 AM)5.9lcummins Wrote: Fuck yeah, I'd drag cut his belly open, tie and a piece of intestine to a tree and then hauling ass with him behind the chariot.

Tell you what. I'll chronicle your exploits, compose the Epic of 5.9cummins to describe how awesome you are, immortalize your name throughout the ages, write several scrolls of the epic and put them in safe places so I can make sure they aren't lost to history, and in return, you bring me back some of that sweet late Greek Bronze Age bling once you finish sacking the city:

[Image: 220px-Tesoro_di_priamo%2C_grande_diadema...%2C_01.JPG]
Deal?



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(01-13-2016, 03:25 AM)Handicap Wrote: Roanoke has more to it than just that. There's also the map they recently realized has covered up locations on it that they are currently trying to figure out how to read without destroying; a map that traces a path from Roanoke further inland and apparently belonged to a family member of someone from Roanoke (I'll have to verify that last bit but I think that's what they said).

That sounds really interesting. I hope they'll do some serious research on this.
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#47
(01-13-2016, 03:25 AM)Handicap Wrote:
(01-12-2016, 11:00 AM)life is killing me Wrote: If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.

Roanoke has more to it than just that. There's also the map they recently realized has covered up locations on it that they are currently trying to figure out how to read without destroying; a map that traces a path from Roanoke further inland and apparently belonged to a family member of someone from Roanoke (I'll have to verify that last bit but I think that's what they said).

I hadn't heard about that. I'm interested to find out more about it. I just don't want to hear it from anything related to The History Channel, because it'd be in a reality TV show where they talk to some old codger in like West Virginia or some shit who has a bunch of legends and stories to tell about his family members from 400 years ago and no real facts. You know, so they can get viewers who believe what he's saying.
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#48
(01-13-2016, 07:52 AM)life is killing me Wrote:
(01-13-2016, 03:25 AM)Handicap Wrote:
(01-12-2016, 11:00 AM)life is killing me Wrote: If any of you read Cracked, there's an article on there from a few years ago (and subsequent articles with the same theme) about history's biggest mysteries and their obvious solutions. One of them basically said about the disappearance of the Roanoke colony that the word "Croatoan" was carved in a tree and that was the only trace the colonists left. Meanwhile, years later, on the fucking ISLAND OF CROATOAN, a bunch of native kids with suspiciously Caucasian features were seen. Hmm, I wonder if maybe the colonists went and lived with the Croatan Indians and maybe got it on with some of them?

I've always enjoyed reading articles that point out the obvious solutions, and sometimes the solutions to some of the bigger, more talked-about mysteries in history are so goddamn obvious I really think people ignore them on purpose so they can craft more elaborate, conspiratorial or supernatural explanations.

I guess Occam's Razor doesn't exist as a concept when it comes to mysteries.

Roanoke has more to it than just that. There's also the map they recently realized has covered up locations on it that they are currently trying to figure out how to read without destroying; a map that traces a path from Roanoke further inland and apparently belonged to a family member of someone from Roanoke (I'll have to verify that last bit but I think that's what they said).

I hadn't heard about that. I'm interested to find out more about it. I just don't want to hear it from anything related to The History Channel, because it'd be in a reality TV show where they talk to some old codger in like West Virginia or some shit who has a bunch of legends and stories to tell about his family members from 400 years ago and no real facts. You know, so they can get viewers who believe what he's saying.

God, I know. I've talked about how much I hate that shit before.

As someone who as actually studied anthropology, my feelings towards the History Channel (particularly Ancient Aliens) are a lot like how Max and other military personnel feel about the Hurt Locker.

At least the Hurt Locker presented itself as fiction and not as being educational.

I could go off on a tangent about this but that's best left to the conspiracy theories thread.
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#49
Yeah, it got praised by critics as "realistic" when none of those critics knew what "realistic" was for the military. Hated that. Katheryn Bigelow is a decent director, though.
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#50
Because, treasure and Lenard Nimoy; 





https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oak_Island

History Channel did a reality show about this last year, of course they still didn't find shit.
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